AOE3 Forums

I walk in and take the copy.

Because the bank no longer has a purpose, it is disassembled by the government and drop on a large salamander for no reason other than they felt like it.

I build a hole. Just a small hole. 

I hire Charles Manson to shoot the babies as they come flying from the hill. When you run out of ammunition, I have soldiers seize the hill and I become military dictator. I then proceed to do dictator-ish things.

(In case you can't tell, I really do not like people under 10 (unless they avoid being idiotic....))

A rabbit eats the nudity.

I place a turtle soup on the hill. 

I burn it with a lighter.

I place the ashes on the hill in a vase.

I lie to a kid, telling him it's choclate milk mix. Then I lie again and tell him it's his dead parents ashes. People are amazed at my inherent cruelty, so I trick them into eating their dead parents in the form of chilli. I then proceed to reestablish my realm, but this time, I build a massive army, and try to look nice when I'm on camera. Secretly though, I'm laughing at my earlier shinanigance. I dictate the people, and overtake the US as the world's leading economic power. I have many friends in other nations, so the US doesn't dare attack me.

The vase breaks of age and the ashes spill.

This creates a great Fertilizer where i plant a tree. When I wake up the tree has grow to be 200 meters high and 45 meters wide. The bark is so thick even lightning cannot go through and burn it. The hill becomes an extensive root network of the tree.

The countries you're allied with are such minor nations like New Caledonia and Luxembourg, so the U.S. does not fear their power and proceeds to negotiate peace with you.

And then out of nowhere it rains Whales.

On the rubble of your destroyed nation I build a wall. Not just any wall, a HUGE wall. One so big it reaches for the skies and extends as far as the eye can see on both sides. It's so big that the vertigo can be enough to kill a bewildered man.